Sweet Suffering
Our fundamental nature is driven by an insatiable desire for self-fulfillment and pleasure. This desire sustains us and motivates everything we do. But here’s the paradox: we can only truly enjoy fulfillment and pleasure when we have a genuine longing for them. If we acquire something effortlessly or stumble upon it by chance, we often take it for granted and quickly lose interest. For instance, a delicious meal can’t be savored without first experiencing hunger, just as romantic pleasures are most fulfilling when preceded by the effort of courtship and connection.
This principle is echoed in countless Hollywood films, where a significant conflict intensifies the journey, making the happy ending feel even sweeter. While we may seek to avoid suffering or unpleasant experiences in our lives, it is through these very struggles that we learn to appreciate success. For example, an athlete who narrowly misses a gold medal and must train for another four years will savor the victory far more than someone who wins on their first try.
In fact, suffering often appears to be a prerequisite for experiencing true pleasure. In love, we frequently endure difficulties and challenges before we can win the heart of our beloved, whether in marriage or a long-term partnership. We may even postpone gratification to deepen our longing, enhancing the subsequent pleasure when we finally attain it.
Interestingly, empirical science offers a unique perspective on this journey: our lives can be viewed as a grand love story. The purpose of our existence, in this view, is to cultivate a loving relationship with the single, creative force that governs reality. Unlike the conditional love we experience daily, this profound, natural love transcends selfish motivations and personal gain. True love is infinite and unconditional, marked by a selflessness that prioritizes the needs of the beloved without regard for personal benefit. This selfless love, in essence, sustains the biological processes within us, creating balance and life itself.
To experience and connect with this true, nurturing love, we must cultivate similar qualities within ourselves. Though we’re born with a tendency toward self-love, developing selflessness and an unconditional love for others requires practice. This transformation unfolds best in environments where we can extend love to others without existing emotional bonds, challenging our inherent selfish tendencies.
As we strive to love others selflessly, we often encounter resistance from our egos. This inner conflict can lead to a heightened sense of awareness – an objective observer within us that recognizes the tension between our selfish impulses and our desire to cultivate genuine love. By acknowledging our original nature and its limitations, we can start to shed aspects of ourselves that hinder our pursuit of true love.
Through distancing ourselves from self-centered desires, we gradually open ourselves to the single, loving force that governs the universe. While we may struggle to fully comprehend its benevolence, we can begin to sense that it is the only force truly at work in our lives. Our greatest misconception is believing that multiple forces shape our existence, leading to confusion and struggle.
By overcoming self-serving tendencies and embracing this singular, guiding force, we elevate our awareness. At this stage, we may not fully grasp the inherent goodness of this force, but we begin to understand its presence. When we embody selfless love and share it with others, we align ourselves with this benevolent force, transforming our entire existence.
As we move from self-centered beings to integral members of a greater whole, we start to sense our interconnectedness and the complementary nature of cause and effect in our lives. Ultimately, when we reach a state of unconditional love and acceptance – genuinely seeking to fulfill others’ desires to the best of our ability – we align ourselves with the loving force that creates and sustains all life. In this elevated state, we perceive reality as a harmonious system governed by a single, benevolent force, fully embracing our place within it and establishing a profound love affair with the essence of existence itself.
Throughout this process, our yearning and love-suffering toward this ultimate state grow. We feel these unique emotions and gauge our progress within mutually devoted, supportive relationships that we cultivate in groups that practice love and selfless giving, challenging our inherent nature.
Upon reaching the final state – a profound, infinite love affair with the singular, creating, and governing force – we transform our initial doubts and struggles into merits. Without deficiencies, love-suffering, or mistakes, we would never experience the incredible pleasure derived from the love we achieve at the end of our journey. This ultimate connection is born from our trials and triumphs, transforming doubt into deep fulfillment and struggle into the pure joy of unity.