In order to spread love, we need to learn what love is first

Zsolt Hermann
1 min readSep 30, 2022

Question from the Internet:

“How can one kickstart love and friendliness in real-world communities through social media?”

In order to kickstart love and friendliness on social media or anywhere else, we need to first learn and practice what “true love and friendliness” is.

We are all born with an inherently self-serving, self-justifying, egocentric and individualistic nature. With our 100% self-oriented “pleasure/pain” calculations, we can only love ourselves; we serve only ourselves.

Most of us are not even aware of this and believe that we can empathize with others, help and support others, and we actually and truly love our “loved ones”. But in fact, we “love” when it gives us a reward when we gain from that love.

Our selfish pleasure/pain calculation based personal computers makes sure that we can’t even move a finger if we do not have selfish fuel to do so. Even the beautiful “motherly love” is not selfless since Nature makes sure through “motherly instincts” that the mother considers her children as part of herself and, as a result, considers them more important than herself and serves them unconditionally.

Thus before kickstarting or spreading “true love,” we need to learn and practice what it means to love others and love those who are outside of our selves and outside of our circle of influence.

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Zsolt Hermann

I am a Hungarian-born Orthopedic surgeon presently living in New Zealand, with a profound interest in how mutually integrated living systems work.